Find Ancestors

please help me!
i am trying to find my dad his name is danny (daniel) mitchell
he used to work in a shop called MARTINS in pitsea my mums name is Valerie Harris (morris)
the subject is very taboo in my family this is the most information i could get.
my name is KIM MITCHELL born in 1984
i know he had another family and moved away when i was a toddler
please please is thier any one that could help me

Do you have your birth certificate, Kim? Just wondering whether it gives a middle name for Daniel, which could help identify him, for instance to see whether he married after he and your mum split.

Your mum's birth surname was Morris -- she has since married and is Harris? Ah, it seems she was Valerie Mitchell when she married Harris, in 1989, so she and your dad were married?

Just asking because an idea of when they divorced might help find whether/when he remarried. And finding a record of his marriage and any children he had (who are identified by both mother's and father's surnames in the index) could help to find him by giving a location.

Your mum and dad married before 1984, so it's not easy to find their marriage the way it is after 1984 (after 1984, names are searchable online).

Their marriage certificate would probably give your dad's father's name. That too could help to locate him. Do you know the date they married? It would be fairly easy to find the record, if you do, and you could get a copy of the marriage certificate. Or just ask your mum to tell you, since you can find out anyhow. ;)

Is your dad from the Pitsea area originally, and might he have family there still? In the phone directory on line:

http://www.thephonebook.bt.com/publisha.content/en/search/residential/search.publisha

there are 22 Mitchells in the area. Do you think any might be related?


These are the Daniel Mitchells who married around the time your mum did. Do any of them look like likely candidates? (The name after Mitchell is the surname of the woman each one of them married)


Daniel Mitchell Berryman Dec 1987 Camborne-Redruth Cornwall
Daniel J Mitchell Harris Aug 1989 Harrow
Daniel J Mitchell Hall Dec 1993 Rochdale Lancashire
Daniel L Mitchell Clifton Jan 1990 Wycombe Buckinghamshire, Oxfordshire
Daniel L Mitchell Ernest Jan 1990 Wycombe Buckinghamshire, Oxfordshire
Daniel S Mitchell Spurr Mar 1990 Newark Lincolnshire, Nottinghamshire
Daniel T Mitchell Gore May 1991 Keighley Yorkshire


Any information you have, pass it on and I or someone else will take a look at it! Just put it in the thread here, and it will pop back up to the top. (I'll see it in my "My Threads" list, for example.)

One more thing -- have you searched trees here at GR for your dad? There are a few Daniel Mitchells born around when I assume he was born, and you could try contacting the people who have them in their tree.

Maybe he's related to Grant, and went to Brazil. ;)

(I'm in Canada, but I watch EastEnders!)

n

as far as i know they wasnt married, my mums maiden name was harris she was born in 1945, i really dont no any other details about him on my birth certificate thier is only my mums name. i know that they were together sumwhere from 1968 onwards but i know my mum was later married to a terry gilbey after 1984

so, you have his name, although he isn't actually named, on your birth cert- is that what you are saying?

you say your mother was never married to him either - yes, is that right?

I cannot actually see your birth registration! Found it - Brentwood Essex

I think Kim means his name isn't on her birth certificate. So we can't check to see whether his middle name is known.

Well ... but ... your dad's name would have to be on your birth cert if your name is Mitchell and your mum and dad weren't married, Kim. I don't think she could have just picked a surname for you that wasn't hers unless your dad was named too ;)

-- Unless your parents had been married, but in that case, if your dad's name wasn't be on the certificate, it would be because he wasn't your dad. Do you have your birth certificate?

Can you check? If you don't have it, wouldn't it be a good idea to get a copy and see what it actually says?


That marriage I found then, it must not be your mum, Kim:

Name: Valerie Mitchell
Spouse: Mark D Harris
Date of Registration: Apr 1989
Registration district: Ashford

That's not it? Because if that is it, then she was married to Danny Mitchell before that.


Do you know what this Martins he used to work at in Pitsea was? There's this in the phone directory:


Post Office - Martins
Tel: (01268) 729346 - Text Number
8 Felmores End, Pitsea, Basildon, SS13 1PN


I don't actually know what that means; it seems to be some sort of chain of stores, with privatized post office outlets maybe?

Do you know how long ago he worked there? Have you ever tried to contact the store owner or manager to ask whether they know him?


It really seems like you need to get information from people who have it. Someone in your family, like your mum, must know something about him. Parents' names, brothers and sisters, what kind of work he did, who he married ... something. Maybe you have an aunt or uncle you could talk to who could tell you something or help you get your mum to talk about it.

It just looks like there aren't any tricks we can try, to find him, without some kind of lead.

That is what i thought strange ..
he isnt named, they were not married and yet Kim has his name...very unusual

(Martins is a newsagent chain - papers/ mags/sweets - that kind of thing
many of them have -or had- a post office counter within them)

Very confusing! Very strange
Valeries' maiden name is Morris (reference Kims birth registration).
Where does Harris come into it?
No record of a marriage for Valerie Morris, Harris, or Mitchell to a Terence/Terry Gilbey,
between 1984-2005.
I will now trawl thru' marriages from 1968 as from what you say Kim, Danny Mitchell & your mother were together from that time.

Well ... I think we oughta wait until Kim sorts this tale out a bit. Kim -- you're 23 years old! You should have a bit better grip on facts than this.

- Your mother's birth surname
- The names on your birth certificate
- Who your mother later married, and when
(just so we have a handle on all these names)

Pretty straightforward stuff, really!

Also, where your mother was born would be helpful.There seems to be an awful lot of Valeries' born in 1945.

my mum was born to frederick and irene harris in 1945,
i can no longer get any information from my mum as she passed away in 2000,
my family will not talk about him to me.
they are extremely stubborn,
i cannot explain how names have changed no one will talk all i know is the address that my mum was living at when she had me was
17 BALFOUR WAY
PITSEA
BASILDON
ESSEX

i have contacted martins but they have since changed hands and will not give out details
i also contacted thier head office but no joy there.

thank you all so much for taking time out of your day to reply to my messageit is greatly apprieciated

Right, do you actually have your own birth cert? -what is so strange is that if they were not married,nor he named on your BCert legally, your surname shouldn't be Mitchell

Also can you confirm what name your mother died with ? Cant see a death for a valerie Gilbey/Harris/Morris or Mitchell in 2000

where does Morris fit it ( that you say originally)

It's funny, Lisa, because your mum's surname in your birth registration is Morris -- and that is supposed to be her birth surname. And I'm sorry to hear about your mum's death, that is hard when you're so young, for a lot more than this reason.

I wonder whether one reason your family won't talk is that you mum's parents weren't married, and she was actually born with her mum's surname, Morris.

... or maybe the other way around. There is no Valerie Morris with mother Morris, or Valerie Harris with mother Morris, born in 1945. But there was a Valerie M Harris with mother Harris born in Chelmsford in Jul-Aug-Sep 1945 (and a Valerie A Harris with mother Harris born in Chippenham in Oct-Nov-Dec 1945).

Do you have your mum's exact birthdate, and the date of her death? Even the months would help. Do you know your mum's middle name or initial?

And could you confirm -- you are Kim Lisa?


Okay, I think we've found your mother's marriage:


Name: Terence M Gilbey + Valerie I Webster
Spouse Surname: Webster
Date of Registration: Jun 1987
Registration district: Brentwood
Registration county (inferred): Essex


Webster? Does that name mean anything to you?

That has to be them, surely.

It's understandable that family members may not want to talk about family stories that may involve unmarried mothers, affairs, etc. But please be assured that no one here gives a hoot. My own family at present includes the mother of my nephew (she and my brother weren't married; we don't go in for that sort of thing in my family) who is now married to the woman of her dreams. ;)

So this is the record of your mum's death, Kim:

Name: Valerie Irene Webster
Birth Date: 26 Jun 1945
Death Registration Month/Year: Sep 2000
Age at death (estimated): 55
Registration district: Brentwood
Inferred County: Essex


I assume she and Terry Gilbey were divorced before she died, and she went back to her previous name.

And here's something you don't seem to know, Kim -- and this may all be getting a bit personal, so as soon as we've worked this out as far as we can, you can go ahead and delete this whole thread if you like. It won't do any harm here for a day or two while we work on it, but you might not want it sitting around here forever.

Your birth was registered under two names:


Name: Kim Lisa Mitchell
Mother's Maiden Surname: Morris
Date of Registration: Mar 1984
Registration district: Brentwood
Registration county (inferred): Essex
Volume Number: 9
Page Number: 2258
Re-registration Year: 0


Name: Kim Lisa Webster
Mother's Maiden Surname: Morris
Date of Registration: Mar 1984
Registration district: Brentwood
Registration county (inferred): Essex
Volume Number: 9
Page Number: 2258
Re-registration Year: 0


My interpretation is that your mother was still married to Mr. Webster at the time you were born, but your father was Mr. Mitchell.

You might want to order both those certificates to see what they say.

Maybe if you talk to the most sympathetic family member you can find and tell them what you have learned, they'd be a bit more willing to talk about it. After all, you know some of what they've been trying to keep from you now, it would seem, so they might agree that there's no point in not explaining it to you now.

I think I have your mum's birth record:

Apr-May-Jun 1945
Harris, Valerie I.
mother: Hobson
district: Epping
vol: 4a
page: 384


But your mum's birth surname on all the later records is Morris. Could she have been adopted by a Morris couple? One would think that in order to marry under the surname Morris -- if she did -- she would have to have had documentation in that name.