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Contacting living relatives by letter

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Linda

Linda Report 3 Apr 2007 08:21

Some time ago there was a thread regarding this about what you should put in the content of the letter which I can't find now - typical. As I shall have more time this weekend - hopefully I'd like to put a letter together to send to some living relatives (who I don't know but have found from doing my husbands tree) but would appreciate some thoughts of what to actually put in it. I've started the letter but keep tweeking it as I can't make my mind up - lol Thanks Linda

Llamedos Pam

Llamedos Pam Report 3 Apr 2007 08:43

Hi Linda, that may have been my thread although there have been several, The first time I wrote I just sent a letter and gave nothing to prove what or who I was and very little details and heard nothing from the lady, I asked on here if anyone thought I could do more and got some tips, because I had a bad year last year i put that search to one side but last week, wrote another letter and this time enclosed a small tree showing where she and I were connected and also a copy of a wedding photo from 1916. I told her a little about myself and as she was an elderly lady I also said that I would come at her convenience and if she was a little nervous then maybe one of her family would like to be with her or a friend, we all know that elderly people are nervous and not everyone is honest, the following day I had a phone call from her and spent two lovely hours with her on Sunday when I arrived she had a friend with her and later one of her daughters also came. She told me that the groom in the photo I had sent her was very much like her son and on looking the resemblance was uncanny with a 50 year difference in ages. She didnt know the information I was looking for but gave me a brother I had no idea had existed, and more important a invitation to go back again. So I would say be friendly enclose information and if they are elderly make them feel safe, I hope you have the same outcome as I did. Regards Pam

Sands

Sands Report 3 Apr 2007 09:35

I wonder how i can go about this one... My cousin who was on my fathers side decided for some reason 15 years ago to lose all ties with our family. We has a family couldnt understand why because we all had letters telling us they were moving and not to contact them. When my uncle died suddenly i thought that my Aunt and cousin should know has it was Aunts brother. For some reason i had a feeling my Aunt had died and when i joined Ancestry i found her death and her husbands . My cousin was the only child and was married although i think she may be divorced . I found her husband and two of her Children on 192.com though it looks like hes with a new partner and remarried. I am not sure what to do now.

Trudy

Trudy Report 3 Apr 2007 13:35

Linda Over the last couple of years I have managed to make contact with two second cousins, both on my dad’s side. I just wrote to them apologising for bothering them if they weren’t the person I thought they were, and introducing myself. I included a couple of family photographs – luckily I had one’s with both them and my Dad in the same picture, and then left it to them to respond. Both of them did, and I have since spent several lovely visits with both of them. Just take it easily and slowly – some people don’t want to be reminded of the past, and others embrace the contact wholeheartedly – just let them decide. Hope it works out for you. Looby

An Olde Crone

An Olde Crone Report 3 Apr 2007 13:50

Sandie In your case I think I would drop your cousins' ex hubby a line, saying you would like to get in contact with your cousin, and would he be willing to pass on a letter from you? Say you are doing your family history, and would his children be interested in seeing a copy of it? You could also say you know the family lost contact but you DON'T KNOW WHY! He may spill the beans, lol. OC

Sands

Sands Report 3 Apr 2007 19:31

Sorry OC would have replied earlier though had to go to work. I was thinking about this idea too. I think its really taking that first step.... Somehow i think its the fear of rejection... On special occasions we have often thought about her and she was a good part of our lifes when she was a child. I would like to share that with her now and my dad and his sister would love to see their neice once again has they are not getting any younger.

Linda

Linda Report 5 Apr 2007 15:45

Thanks for all your tips. Must make sure I put an hour aside this weekend in amongst all the other jobs ! Have a good Easter Linda