Genealogy Chat

I have a friend who is wanting to try and find out about her birth family without upsetting any apple carts We know her birth name and d.o.b and the mothers surname but that is the only info we have any suggestions please? Luv TJ xxxx

Trawlling BDM for sibs/marriages/deaths. telephone directories same as any other living person hunt. has he got her birth cert? that will have mothers full name on

hi tj if you search for adoptions threads on the boards there is lots of helpful advice from people looking for their birth parents good luck lorraine

Ann I am quite willing to HUNT like any other person and have done quite successfully for my own family tree but you see not being adopted and having very limited info i was hoping for a bit of help from maybe people who were..... I'm sorry I asked ......... Thanx Lorraine i am doing that and a couple of people who obviously have been through it have pm'd me with some wonderful advice :-))))))))

start point is the same thought say John born 1962 to mother Freda Smith, lets say Exeter. With the birth cert in hand ( as i did say) you know if this is mothers maiden or married name, depending on which, you'd trawl for potential marriages , or birth of sibs...wouldnt you?? What would you do if you didnt do that?? Is there a way of finding out if named father is the real father - I didnt think there was- please tell me if i am wrong I dont understand why that is different to a non adopted person, who has a birth cert with a name on it, who has no idea what happened to that person

Dont really see what your problem is...why have you taken umbridge with me? if you know names and etc's the hunt is no different to that of a non adopted person - is it?

It might be different Ann - a lot depends on whether or not the father is named, and if he is, whether he is named correctly. There is also a possibility of the mother being married to someone who is not the father, so yet another permutation of details. Mandy

no birth cert - just birth entry in register although we do know that she is the result of an affair which is why she was put up for adoption....... no adoption papers .......... just name.... dob and mothers maiden name .....

Then sending for that cert must be the very first step.mustn't it? or her adoption file I am trying to help you here, i dont understand why you have taken umbridge with me. can you explain why? ann

If you have her name in the birth register ...... why can't you apply for her birth certificate??? She HAS to have one. That MAY tell you who was named as the father, if any.

First step would be to order the birth cert. The father might be listed and you will get an address at least. Also the mother's full name. Rose

Ann - maybe I have taken one of your original comments out of proportion and the comment was 'same as any other living person hunt' I am hunting - but as I said I am willing to hunt and only have very limited info - orig birth cert is ordered and awaiting delivery - but in the meantime - it doesn't mean to say that you cannot ask for peoples advice to help in an area of life you don't fully understand the protocol and by that I mean adoption.... If I have upset you I apologize but the manner with which that comment was written appears very sarcastic ...... regards TJ I am not interested in bickering with anyone and appreciate and I mean really appreciate anybodies help .....

OK, but giving a child for adoption, doesnt make the process of hunting them down different to anyone else. No sarcasm was intended I can assure you You need that birth cert, with the address on it, ideally the adoption file- she will have to apply for that though, not you. To access that , she will have to undergo councilling, if she was adopted before 1975, its not optional , it has to be done. That file will tell her circumstances, whatever they were, (which maybe different to what she has been told) adoptive parents dont always tell the whole truth

Something else I just thought of too. As she was adopted before 1975, she has to undergo one statutory counselling session arranged via Social Services. This is because birth mothers who gave children up before 1975 (when there was a major law change) were told that their child would NEVER be able to find them. Please suggest that she contacts her local Social Services department for initial advice (it doesn't have to be the SS in the area from which she was adopted, her local one will help). Mandy

Sorry mandy , we have overlapped

Don't take umbrage. 'Same as any other living person hunt' means 'it's the same as the hunt for any living person'. I think you took it as an instruction to hunt (which it isn't). P