Genealogy Chat

Heather, I have to agree with you. I have recently been contacted by someone who has my first cousin once removed married to a different woman! I thought it could be a case of two marriages but the marrages were only a year apart! My contact doesn't seem to send for certificates and when I looked at her tree she had my uncle down as a sibling to his cousins!!! What a mess! I have tried to persuade her that she needs to send for certificates and have shown her the two marriage entries on Free BMD with just a year between them. She wants to see my tree but I am reluctant to show it to her because I have a feeling it will all be tacked on regardless. She is using pure guesswork and isn't checking her work as she goes with certificates. Beware of guesswork - it can totally lead you down the wrong path. Her tree mainly consists of living people! :-( Cheers, Horatia

Tish it may come to the point that if you give 100% certified info to this person, they still wont believe you and at that point you have just to be satisfied in yourself that you are right and thats an end to it - otherwise it will drive you barmy. I still have my US contact who I have clearly demonstrated to that the man he chose as his ancestor is definitely not the right guy (my own GGFx2) but this chap refuses to believe me - despite the fact the man he has lived some 30 miles from my GGFx2 and was still alive throughout all the census at the same time! Ive given up now and cant be bothered to keep sending more and more detail. This man is so obviously my GGFx2 - the family lived in the same road for over 100 years and even my dearest dad - who died last year aged 91 - remembered delivering firewood to his grandad at that address, (who was the son of this man). I think some people are happy to latch on to any convenient person who turns up in the IGI and just wont back down having spent years following the wrong line.

Thanks Reg! All tips are taken on board and written down to follow up. I can see the need for more certificates and as it is payday, I will send for them. Good luck everyone

Hi Heather Thanks for the advice. I have found out that family memories are not so good, after being given wrong first names in the past! As regards area, it is the area the family were born in and grew up in, the church is the same church used by other family members. The occupation has been the same throughout. Thanks for the advice, I will try to follow through other avenues as suggested by all. Thanks and good luck with your own research

If your relation did by chance marry twice, and all offspring were from the second marriage, it is entirely possible that they were unaware of the first marriage. Second wives are often reluctant to acknowledge their predecessors.............. Reg

Just a word of caution, family memories arent always correct. I found by accident that my grandfather had been married twice. My aunt (his daughter) was absolutely gobsmacked and wouldnt believe me until I sent her the marriage cert. However, if he was an honest bloke, one cert should show him as a widower. It should be relatively easy to decide who is right - the occupation of bride and groom - do they tie in? And fathers names and occupations? And you say one guy is miles away? Have you tried to follow him in the census to see if he is still alive and kicking at the same time as your family - in which case he is a red herring? The church they married in, does it tie in with the area they lived in with their families?

Hi to everyone. Thank you all for such a quick and prompt reply. A few avenues there to follow. I know that my g/g/grandad did only marry once, there are still family relatives alive, i.e. his grandchildren who have confirmed this for me, and I have a photos of him and his wife. I also have their marriage cert. I will now check Ancestry BMD to find the references for childrens birth certs. Thanks for the guidance, I will post details if I am still going around in circles.

Marriage certificates should be sent for and the bridegrooms father's name should match. If he has a different father's name then it is not the same person. The father's occupation can also be used as a guide - although this isn't easy if they are just referred to as Labourer. Where you have two marriages, you should check to see if you can find the first wife dying. This will confirm that the second marriage could have taken place. Cheers, Horatia

Tish if you post some details names,dates & places of birth we could double check for you. I hope his surname wasn't Smith. Georgina.

You say you have problems when you get back to your g/g/grandfather's spouse. Did they have any children who were born after 1837 - if so you could get one of their birth ceritifcates which would give mother´s maiden name. This will then help you confirm whether the marriage you have found is the correct one.

The birth cert of your gt-gdparent (child of gt-gt-grandfather) should give names of both parents - gt-gt-father and his spouse . How does this fit in with both trees? jay

If you post a few details of the 2 lines, ie names, approx. dates and place, I'm sure someone will take a look and see what they think. Gwyn

Apologies as this is not a tip, I dont know where to put this post. I have been following my family tree and making good progress, or so I thought, until I found someone else who matches some of my tree but not all of it. We differ when the tree gets to my g/g/grandfather's spouse. I have his (or what I think is his) birth cert and marriage cert and found that they tie up nicely and had family confirm details. The other person has my g/g/grandfathers birth cert and marriage cert and has him marrying twice, neither of the names match mine, and my g/g/grandfather only married once. I have found only one other person with the same name and year of birth, but they were born miles and miles away from where the family settled and stayed. Has anyone else come up agains this type of problem, if so, how did you go about double checking and confirming the facts, I cannot go any further back until this hurdle has been overcome. Any suggestions as to what to do next would be greatly appreciated.