Genealogy Chat

Hi,

After reading the thread on hotmatches I am ashamed th say my biggest is 3!! I hav`nt contacted the person concerned because after reading the horror stories about tree copying and non replies I dont want to upset him by refusing tree access or be dissapointed if he dos`nt reply. I have never yet replied to a hot match and I do feel guilty in case I have info that someone else needs. I would gladly give any info I have to someone genuine but dont want my tree to be copied willy nilly. How do you go about it in the right way? Any advice please. Thanks Denise.

Have you confirmed that the 3 matches really match your tree? Remember that they only match a name and year of birth. The place of birth isn't considered. If the matches are genuine, go ahead and send him a message, and just ask first if the people concerned match his. Don't volunteer any info at the initial contact. It is then up to the other person to get back to you. Helen

Hi Helen, The three I have match with the dates and names. They also have the place on them as well and they also match. It is a father, mother and son on the same line so seems promising. Thanks for the advise, I have nothing to lose if I do as you suggest. Thanks Denise.

Denise, I make sure that the ability to view my tree is switched off before I reply. When I get the other person's background, I decide whther to allow access Anne.

Thanks Anne, I didnt know about the tick box. Will remember that for the future. Much appreciated, Denise.

I have taken on board all your advice, unticked the tree viewer box and sent a message. I will now wait and see?. Thanks again. Kind Regards Denise.

Just don't be too disappointed if you don't get a reply. I've found that sometimes the people are no longer members. On the other hand, when you do get a reply and it's a positive match it's the best feeling :-)