Genealogy Chat

In this heat!! My friend lost her 22yr old son in January, so as you can imagine she tends the grave daily. 4 lots of fresh flowers went up there this morning, but by tea time they looked like they had been there a month! Any tips for long lasting flowers please? Thank you....Sam

Does she have a vase or container on the grave for them? Could she get permission to plant something like lavendar - which love dry hot weather - on the grave?

She could try a bunch of dried flowers for the time being and hope it doesn't rain. Rose

bleach and sugar

The water retaining granules put them into the pot then fill with water lasts ages. xxhugxx

Hi For keeping roses put your stems into the water and then recut underneath the water. This stops a air bubble forming which blocks the water going up the stem. This is why some flowers fall over very quickly. Add some lemonade to the water. This stops bacteria growing and adds sugar to the water. Irene

Thank you everyone, I'm going to print this for my friend. She has 5 vases up there. ''Added by The Ego Has Landed bleach and sugar'' Oh please explain!!

this is a method my dad uses-the bleach in small dose kills the bacteria and the sugar acts as a food-those sachets you get are virtually that.....sounds strange I know,but just a drop or two dilute......

Add lemonade to the water

Hi Smiley, what about some lovely silk flowers until the cooler weather comes back ! we went to a funeral here last monday and the 'NEW RULES' are no flowers from the garden can be put on the coffin only florists allowed now, the lady loved arranging flowers and all the ladies from her club brought flowers but the answer was no. sad really. Chris

I cant imagine what your friend must have gone through - its heartbreaking just to think how she must feel. Its good she has a good friend in you.

Chris in Oz What a sad rule and how unfeeling towards those ladies who wanted to share their mutual love of flowers. Some graveyards here have rules about no artificial flowers. Best to check before any distress is caused by not knowing any local rules. Gwyn

Artificial flowers are ok in this particular churchyard. No photographs allowed on headstones though, and only grey stones...no black. Regulation height too. Having said all that, it's a beautiful churchyard, so well cared for, and all voluntarily too. The stone they chose is the best I've ever seen. His Dad spoke at the funeral, saying how when he had walked his dog that morning that he had taken shelter under a large oak tree that had been hit by lightening in the past. His thoughts obviously turned to his son, it had made him realise that although their son was now gone, his roots will always be entwined with theirs, just like the oak. The head stone, chosen from a stone masons catalogue a few weeks later, is arched branches of a tree hung over a tablet of grey granite with gold writing- fabulous, it was as if it had been designed just for their son

Soluble aspirin in the water. Don't know how it works but it does.

Hi Smiley My friends daughter is a florist and she makes up these 'water bombs' (as she calls them) They are arranged fresh flowers with the stems in water which is held in the celafane (oops! sorry about spelling but sure you know what I mean lol) Then tied with a ribbon. They look lovely and keep for ages. By the way.... I have written my wishes down for my own funeral. They are as follows......... I dont want you all to waste your money on flowers that will rot and fade and I cant see em anyway! What I would like is for each of you to leave on my grave ONE flower from each of you. You can pick it or nick it! I wont be around to tell you off....hang on! you havent got off cheap yet! I'd love a healthy donation to be given to an animal charity , especially one that helps against Animal cruelty. ....I'm the nutty kid that used to watch cowboy n indian films on the TV and cry for the horses that fell over!!! lol My Mum used to say...'it's only a film! The horsie gets up in a min and gets his oats!!' and oh! boy! did I love the old Lassie films! lol I cant imagin what it's like to lose a child Smiley :-( Love n prayers for you friend x Gerri x

My heart go's out to this Mum-I am in a similar position-all we can do is keep replacing them-but I have put twisted bamboos on which love the heat-and they are a lovely green and grow for ever-I will remove them in the winter and take them back next summer-I do add a few fresh flowers along side these-but how about putting other things on-I put on a Rabbit-cos Bright Eyes was one of my Son's song's-also I have planted some flowers and I go along and water them. Just a few ideas.

Lovely thoughts and helpful ideas Thank you everyone Sam xxx