Genealogy Chat

I am after some advice, I am adopted and I think I have found my birth mother via this website. I'm not 100% sure as the middle name is listed as Mary, whilst by adoption certificate says Marie. However all the other details correspond, place of birth and age when I was adopted. I'm reluctant to contact her as this does not seem the most appropiate way to contact someone after 35 years, can anyone offer some advice as to what I could do next? Thankyou.

Speaking from the other side, I had a son adopted and we are now in touch. He contacted social services in the area, and they contacted me as an intermediary. You could check with the authorities where you were born or adopted to see if your birth mother has added a note about whether she wants contact or not. I believe that this can be done, as birth parents can`t trace adopted children as easy as adopted chidren can trace birth mothers. Hope this is of help to you and I wish you well

Hi Paul, I have e-mailed you direct. Regards Sheila

Hi Paul, this will be a very emotional time for you and you will need plenty of support. As Carol has suggested, contact either your local social services where you are living now, or the one nearest to where your adoption took place. I had statutory counselling from SServices, then they put me in touch with Norcap. They are a bona fide adoption organisation and registered charity. Even if you decide not to become a member (although this gives you unlimited access to their services), there is plenty of information on their website www(.)norcap(.)org - removing brackets. My very best wishes for a successful reunion. Mandy

If someone did not want to be found why oh why would they put their name on such a public website.? I think she is very lucky to have a child who is being so sensitive about the matter. I hope you find all that you are searching for . Good Luck TRacey

Yes I would go back to the adoption agency to find out what's on your file - can be an eye opener. If she's put her name down here then there is certainly a good chance she wants contact. I know a lady who is desperate to get in touch with her children - they were taken away from her and she desperately wants to tell her side of the story. There's always two or even more versions of the same some are heart rendering others it was best for the kids. There may be a Post Adoption Agency near to you, they are a charity and I don't think they charge for helping and are very experienced and offer advice in the pitfalls that could occur. There's the WMPAS in Birmingham. If not you could ask someone to make the first move - its better going through an intermediary as you have no idea what you're letting yourself in for. Some reunions have been fantastic others the opposite.

Hi Paul i'm going thru the same thing right now so have e-mailed you direct ali