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Technology

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

LadyScozz

LadyScozz Report 14 May 2014 00:59

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX),

Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated,

"If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, Ford issued a press release stating:

If Ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics :

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash.........twice a day.

2.. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3... Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4.... Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5..... Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6...... The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7....... The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8........ Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9......... Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10.......... You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

PS - when all else fails, you could call "customer service" in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how to fix your car yourself

:-D

SylviaInCanada

SylviaInCanada Report 14 May 2014 05:37

:-D :-D

LadyScozz

LadyScozz Report 14 May 2014 06:55

I don't know if this story is true......... received an email this morning......... I don't care if it's true or just a joke, it's a funny story (I can relate to most of it).

:-D

Tenerife Sun

Tenerife Sun Report 14 May 2014 07:01

I think it's great and will pass it on.

Kense

Kense Report 14 May 2014 08:16

Maybe Ford issued it recently but GM did that in the last century:

http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/autos.asp

OneFootInTheGrave

OneFootInTheGrave Report 14 May 2014 08:23

Love it and can relate to it - must pass it on to a few friends :-D :-D :-D

LadyScozz

LadyScozz Report 14 May 2014 12:09

lol :-D another "recycled" joke

doesn't matter, it made me laugh.



+++DetEcTive+++

+++DetEcTive+++ Report 14 May 2014 12:45

:-D :-D

LadyScozz

LadyScozz Report 14 May 2014 13:34

they forgot one........

11. For no reason, your car would empty your boot/trunk & glovebox, you will never see these items again.

That might explain why many emails I had kept have disappeared! :-(