General Chat

I have just been talking to my friend on the phone and she was so angry, annoyed, and upset (all at the same time) She and her OH had a BBQ on Saturday evening, she asked people to be there at 5 o'clock for 5.30 start. She specified the time as there was a number of young children and they did not want it to run on too late.Two couples (they are her step daughters) arrived within minutes of each other at 7.45. This is not the first time they have done this as they have done the same once at a party at our house.

I understand that unexpected things can happen to cause delays, with children, traffic, etc, but this seems to be a recurring scenario. However, i think it is gross bad manners, and shows an utter lack of respect.

I was cross when they turned up late at our house, but did not get upset, however I am really annoyed for my friend.

What would you say is an acceptable time to turn up late.

I have to say both OH and I are known for our punctuality, that the way we were taught, and shows respect for the people we are visiting.

As it seems to be a habit, the next time I HAD to invite them, I'd give the time as 2 hours earlier. Then, if they actually turn up on time 'jokingly' explain why they were given the wrong time, and invite them to help :-D

...I've done it...... :-D :-D

...They moaned about it to someone else - who pointed out that it was a good idea, as their track record wasn't too good. So, not only did I get my point across, they realised they peed off others' too.

If they were that late, I would have said there was no food left and I was about to clear up.

I agree with Paula. It is bad manners to be more than a few minutes late.

I just hate been late for anything

when we were late for the London meet I was devastated :-( :-(

I actually think it is done deliberately ( I can't think why) because they always arrive at the same time. I said I would not invite them again, but they are relatives of OH, so its a tricky situation.

I hate being late for appointments. But I suffer a bit for arriving too early.

Some people turn up late because they don't want to be the first to arrive. Being nearly three hours late is over-doing it a bit though.
My dad is always late for everything, so always gets told an earlier time than everybody else.

We are never late, early if anything, which is just as irritating :-)

I would tell them a time 3 hours earlier than the actual event next time...........if I decided to bother asking them :-D

As they make a deliberate habit of it I wouldn't invite them again. Being that late is disrespectful to the host.
Has anyone confronted them about this juvenile behaviour?

I hope the barbecue was cold and the food all eaten and no drink left either. What age group are they? I think one of their nearest and dearest should have a word with them about acceptable behaviour. Maybe up to 30 minutes late is acceptable except in an emergency. It doe sound planned if they arrive together, as if they meet for a drink beforehand.

I think this unfortunately is a sign of the times...
Everything these days seems to be so laid back and attitudes aren't what they were.
I hate being late for anything.Thats the way we were taught .

I talk to a friend of mine regularly on the phone,and we are always discussing the habits today....sounding like grumpy old women....but standards have certainly gone down....I bet they didn t make much of an apology for being so late either.
A genuine breakdown or emergency is a different matter...or calling to say that something cropped up...but it seems that it's quite OK and normal for them!

It is rude, especially as a particular time was specified. I would have offered them a couple of sausages that had been nicely carbonised, with some warm beer to wash them down!

AnninGlos. The four people concerned are all mid thirties. I must be honest I am reluctant to invite them again, and have told OH that if I do he had better lay it on about being on time. Perhaps they don't want to come to these family get togethers, they are not my family, so I can't say I would be upset, but it's nice to know rather than turn up late.

I would say something similar to "Oh we thought as you were so late that you weren't coming, all the food has gone. I might be able to make you a sandwich in a minute when I've finished .........doing whatever it is you can find to do to delay the sandwich making.

I would make sure they saw the last sausage being eaten by the dog.

:-|

I´m quite happy to have someone turn up around 15-20 minutes late. After all Things can happen to delay you.
Any more than that & I would hope to get a phone call if the person has a mobile.
Normally I will wait up to 45 minutes, then I leave.
Got told off by a friend the other week because she said she was sick of me complaining about her being late.
Not nearly as sick as I am of waiting for her.!!!