General Chat

Do you feel responsibility to say thank you for your children in their twenties?

We are trying to be supportive towards a young person who is recovering from mental health problems. Have had him staying with us more than several times over the last year, giving up my bedroom as it has such a comfy bed, and cooking breakfasts and offering our best hospitality.

We are happy to do this and enjoy seeing his health improve. He is a very appreciative guest so we don't go without thanks.

If anybody were to do the same for a child of mine (which is unlikely!), I couldn't let the moment pass without a text, a call, a bunch of flowers….

Lavender I don´t have children and I would hope that my parents never had to say a thank you for me that I couldn´t make for myself.
But yes I have said thank you to others on behalf of people who are related, or have taken opportunities due to my friendship.
Personally I have always believed friendship is a gift so each act deserves a thanks.

I find it interesting, Uzzi.

Knowing the parents, they would believe that they have brought their child up well, so he quite capable of saying thank you himself. Which he does.

In my heart, am doing it as much for the parents, so that they have peace of mind knowing that others are also caring for him, to lessen their load.

I would be totally unable not to express my gratitude in helping to keep my child alive.

I don't have children either, but I think if it was a child of mine recovering from mental health problems I would have to thank someone that was helping them. For one thing I would be so grateful to be getting some help/support in what is usually a difficult situation. Also, often one of the features of mental health difficulties is to be so absorbed with your problems you aren't always able to remember/think of the niceties of manners and politeness. Well done you for taking the trouble to try and help. <3 <3

He's a very likeable, intelligent boy, so it's no hardship. Am just on my knees with exhaustion today, I was coping at the time but have now caved in.

It is probably because I have suffered with mental illness that I have an understanding and appreciate that others are often not there..

Lavender do I read right that this is because your friends do not say thank you for what you are doing for their son ?
It´s wrong if they are not expressing it but then as you say you are doing it as much for his sake as for theirs and he says thank you.

We did have a little polite thank you when we met these relatives a while ago, but we had already had him here very many times before.

We are all different!