General Chat

Well it's been another day of things to do

Our daughter came up again and we went to order flowers . I made the booking for the funeral reception at a hotel near the crem and paid the deposit

Had a call again from the coroner that the doctor had sent the wrong form and unsigned so the interim cert can't be issued but it's all in hand

Was concerned about his attendance allowance needing to be cancelled so rang the DWP and they were great . Took his details with security cross checks and asked if he had any other gov allowances , Said yes he has, his pension and they asked I had too and my NHS. nos .apparenty I may be entitled to something from his contributions. They would also inform the tax office so that's 3 must do done

Need to do council tax and the utilities but these can wait as the bank will honour direct debits as well as his funeral expense from his bank account

Tomorrow I have to have the bee tooth out that gave me the abcess .the antibiotics have sorted it but still have the chesty cough but it has improved

So we are sorting things slowly

It's so confusing what has to be done especially when you have never been in the situation before . I am a retired Office Manager but my initial panic was shit what do I do and where to start

Glad I have the cat here to have cuddles and speak too <3

Shirley, thinking of you as you cope with another day of heartache and upsets.
I hope you will feel comforted by knowing that you did everything that you could possibly do to make your husband as comfortable as he could be until the end.
You are bound to feel empty and drained so try to eat little and often and just remember to be kind to yourself right now. Sending (((hugs))) to support you. xxx

Lots of advice here for you Shirley and lots of love from your friends on here. We can't help with all the paperwork (and there will be plenty) so I hope your family will help with that, but we can provide virtual hugs and support. You know there is always somebody here to talk to if you want to. I know there will be tears, but there will be smiles as well as you remember things, and there will be glasses of wine too. As has been said, you will get through it, painful though the journey will be. If there was not pain there would not have been love. You and your M had a loving life together to the end so of course there is pain, I don't think you would wish it any other way. Many ((((((hugs)))))) from me <3 <3 <3

Gentle hugs for you Shirley, as you deal with emotions your loss is bringing. Just take things day by day and let the tears flow when they will, smile when you can and acccept all the help offered. This time of year is depressing so you may feel worse before you feel better, try not to be alone any more than you want to be and try to eat properly to keep your strength and immune system well. Don't forget your flu jab if you haven't had it yet.

Thinking of you,

Lizxx

I also wish I could give you a big hug Shirley. Bless you <3 <3

(((hugs))) xxx

Cry as much as you need Shirley but be comforted knowing that you were loving to the end and made your hubby happy.

Thinking of you <3 <3

<3 <3 <3 <3

<3 <3 <3 Shirley

It's awful, but you'll get through it - you'll find you go on to autopilot to begin with as there is so much to do, so many things to sort out and this will take up a lot of your time - it's when things die down and you take stock that things will hit you hard, but you have family and I'm sure they will be a great support to you and in time things will get better

<3 Shirley <3

Shirley I wish I could give you a big hug. <3

Oh Shilrey you are entiltled to shed an ocean of tears and if a couple + glasses are what you want then thats fine,,,,,,its a horrible and raw time for you just now and will be for some time to come adjusting your time and life to a different level.......in time .things wil come along that will make you smile ,a little jolt of a familiar that brings back a nice memory .sometimes it will make you sad,but I'm sure the happy memories will be in bucketsfull of your dear M,,,,,,,,,,.Bless you.
<3 <3
x

Thank you all

We are in an odd place of denial at the mo

On Monday I had a call from the coroners office because as he was unable to consent to his medical needs his rights were terminated so they could medicate him , so his death has to reported to the coroner for a read through inquest. In the meantime they will issue an interim death cert so we can get on with what needs doing

Our daughter came up yesterday and we went to the hospice to collect his things . When they took him in by ambulance they took him in the bedlinen he was in the bed in and kept him on his pillow in the hospital bed . Seeing the pillow cracked me up and was very painful.
We had some lunch and them decided to make enquiries at the local funeral director we thought we would go with . They were very nice and we accepted the quote and then arranged his funeral ,

This morning I had a visit from the deacons wife and we had a nice chat and after she left I had to go shopping as was out of things like milk etc. I took his used meds in to the pharmacy to dispose of them

Did a shop and went back to the car and was backing out of the spot and got a tap on the window and told you have a flat tyre on the rear passenger side

Tried to ring the AA and didn't get through so decided to nurse the car to the local tyre place . Got there ok and they had to replace tyre cos it had a bulge as well as a big nail in it

£60 plus some time later I decided to still do my intended visit to the bank to inform them and was told you need his death cert , they made me an appointment for next monday

Drove home and parked up outside the house and sat in the car and had a sobbing cry

Have had a couple of glasses now of rose as I need it
:-( :-(

So sorry to read this, my love to Shirley and her family at this very sad time <3

Thinking of you Shirley at this sad time. You take care.

Carol <3

Shirley, you and you family are in my thoughts and prayers. xxx

Still in my thoughts Shirley and family. <3 <3

Oh Shirley, I was so sorry to read this news.

Sending my condolences and hugs to you and your family <3

Dear Shirley

So very sorry to hear of this news.

My deepest sympathy to you and your family.

With deep respect,
Love from Elizabeth, EOS
xx

Sincere condolences to Shirley and her family.

Look after yourself Shirley xx