General Chat

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Thank you all again.

OH's move has been delayed until Wednesday next week, the room needed repainting and new flooring, and apparently the flooring is not quite ready. So we then had to find a date that fitted both the people here and the people who are doing the packing and moving.

This is complicated by the fact that this is a Jewish residence (with a significant number of non-Jewish residents!), Friday is sort of a half-day for moves, some senior essential-for-the-move staff would not be here on Friday or through the weekend, and Monday is a Stat holiday! The moving company was also very busy as a lot of people move around this time!

It has actually eased the feeling of rushing, and OH has taken the news of the move very well, so I hope he will settle quickly. I found my feet very quickly, especially as everyone from staff to other residents let me take my own time to calm down. I still have a few things to find ......... other people don't always put things away as you yourself would do!! I found a special little pillow this morning!

Sorry to hear about the delay Sylvia. Hope all goes well next Wednesday <3

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Hope tings will settle down. <3

It sounds as if things, despite the delay, will settle down once the holiday weekend is over. Good that your OH took the delay well. I do hope that you will be very happy there and that you can soon find all those precious belongings. <3

All went well yesterday, although I ended up very tired and hurting a lot, so have been taking it easier today.

OH is complaining that they don't show him a menu at meal times, and he is just presented with something. The old place had menus with lots of choices at every meal! Here we see a week's menu in advance and mark our choices for lunch and dinner. He'll learn!!

So pleased it all went off well and I hope the aches go.

Can’t say I blame your OH as I don’t think I would remember what I had ordered days beforehand.

Just wondering how you are Sylvia as havent seen you posting for awhile? Hope all is ok with you & hubby

Florence in the hebrides

I second that thought Florence

Yes Caroline, I was just looking at various threads and then I realised we hadnt seen Sylvia post. So hope all is ok.

Hopefully it is just a PC/WIFI problem. Hope all is OK Sylvia with you both.

I'm sorry that I haven't posted!

I hadn't realised it was quite so long before I gave an update .......... I have been looking in quite regularly, but it is also late in the evening for me and I have been too tired to post anything.

Things are going OK, OH is still not accepting that this is the last move we will make, and believes that he/we are only here temporarily.

Mainly the days have settled into a routine .......... I have breakfast in my own suite (even though I could go down for an earlier one in the dining room). Go down for lunch, then go round to OH's room (or pull him away from the video showing in their lounge) and stay for about an hour, trying to keep his memory going. I go back to my suite for the afternoon and leave him to his own devices. I go back to see him after dinner for about 30 minutes or so, then back up to my place, and try to wind down before going to bed much earlier than I've been used to!

The worst has been that he has been refusing to do things, and the nurses then ask me to try to change his mind! We are slowly coming to agreements on what and when he will do things, sometimes coinciding with what the nurse or aide wants to do them!

I did take over marking his choices for meals the next week, with him telling me what he wanted after I've explained it a little. Then I take it with my own menu choice and have the receptionist copy it. I then give him the copy back so he can consult it every day. I started doing that when he told me that his meal choice was simple .......... the choice with the fewest words in the description!

When I go to see him, I ask how his lunch/dinner was ................. and he usually can't remember even if it is only about an hour later. :-(

It's good to hear from you, Sylvia, and to know that you are OK.
It must be such a relief to know that someone else is now responsible for your husband's 24/7 care.

I hope he will settle down more as time goes on.

Even without dementia, it takes me a while to remember what I had for my last meal!

Morning Sylvia
So glad you have posted and to know all is well.

Yes its a big change for your OH but at least you are in the same place as him and dont have all the worry you had before,

I hope in time, things will settle and dont forget to take care of yourself too!

Florence in the hebrides

The good part is no taxis across town with winter coming up as much as everything!

The ordering food is a bit different but I'm sure you get used to it in the end, and the not cooking it shopping for it and doing the dishes all helps too.

Dear Sylvia

Hello

Sending you and your family caring thoughts. <3

Take gentle care
Love Elizabeth, EOS
xx

Thank you all for your kind words.

Caroline ................ you've hit the nail on the head .......... no taxis needed to go to see him. No having to think about meals or do the shopping.

What little I do need can be ordered online. The pharmacy I've used for many years delivers here for free (!!!!) even though the grocery store itself does not deliver (pick-up at the store only). The nurse at the unit orders everything for Iain, and the cost is then added to his monthly bill (which of course, I pay).

Florence ......... the ordering of the meal is pretty simple, doesn't take much getting used to, especially when you find out what to do if there is nothing you can eat, there's another sheet with alternatives that also keep to the major rules ..... no meat at lunch time so dairy can be used and no dairy at dinner because meat is served.

As an example, the meal choice this lunch time was Smoked Salmon and Leek Frittata or Eggplant Parmigiana. I would have like the first but believed it contained dairy, as does the Eggplant. So my choice off the alternative menu was Lox on a Bagel with the cream cheese omitted. That's an idea of what we eat.

However, there was a chef on duty who had cooked a special dairy-free Frittata in a small dish for me! It was delicious!! Then I got a bowl of grapes and strawberries instead of the lemon cake for dessert.

But OH was simply not bothering to read the menu choices, either because it was too much trouble, or he was having difficulty understanding. He is reading books and newspapers, but much slower than he used to (even though I was always a much faster reader than he was.

BTW .......... fall is creeping in here. Today is sunny, will reach about 16C or thereabouts. BUT it got down to 9C overnight (according to a news report), and it might go down to 7C tonight!

Good to hear from you Sylvia and know that all is well with you and OH.

Thank you, Ann <3