General Chat

to all, and wishing you and your families a Safe and Happy New Year


It was Christmas Day in the workhouse
The merriest day of the year
The paupers and the prisoners
Were all assembled there.

In came the Christmas pudding
When a voice that shattered glass
Said, “We don’t want your Christmas pudding
So stick it there with the rest of the unwanted presents.”

The workhouse master then arose
And prepared to carve the duck
He said “Who wants the parson’s nose
And the prisoners shouted “You have it yourself, sir.”

The vicar brought his Bible
And read out little bits.
Said one old crone at the back of the hall
“This man gets on very well with everybody.”

The workhouse mistress then began
To hand out Christmas parcels.
The paupers tore the wrappers off
And began to wipe their eyes, which were full of tears.

The master rose to make a speech
But just before he started
The mistress, who was fifteen stone,
Gave three loud cheers and nearly choked herself.

And all the paupers then began
To pull their Christmas crackers.
One pauper held his too low down
And blew off both his paper hat and the man’s next to him.

A steaming bowl of white bread sauce
Was handed round to some.
An aged gourmet then called aloud
“This bread sauce tastes like it was made by a continental chef.”

Mince pie with custard sauce was next
And each received a bit.
One pauper said “The mince pie’s nice
But the custard tastes like the bread sauce we had in the last verse!”

The mistress dishing out the food
Dropped custard down her front.
She cried “Aren’t I a silly girl!”
And they answered “You’re a
perfect picture as always ma’am !”

“This pudding “, said the master,
“Is solid, hard and thick.
How am I going to cut it?”
And a man cried, “Use your penknife sir, the one with the pearl handle.”

The mistress asked the vicar
To entertain his flock.
He said, “What would you like to see ?”
And they cried, “Let’s see your conjuring tricks, they’re always worth watching.”

“Your reverence, may I be excused ?”
Said one benign old chap.
“I don’t like any conjuring tricks.
I’d sooner have a carol or two around the fire”

So then they all began to sing
Which shook the workhouse walls.
“Merry Christmas!” cried the master,
And the inmates shouted “Best of luck to you as well sir!”


Well, it is Christmas after all :-D :-D

You have made our Xmas Allan, OH and I love this poem :-D :-D :-D.
We hope you and your loved ones have a very Merry Christmas and a Peaceful New Year. <3 <3

Thanks, LaGooner :-D :-D :-D

Haha love it Allan

Wishing you and your family a Merry Xmas and all the best for the New Year :-D

Thanks, Florence, and a safe and happy Christmas to you and your family. Not forgetting that absolutely Scottish traditional celebration of Hogmanay :-D :-D

:-D :-D
Merry Christmas Allan hope you and your family have a lovely time, and a Merry Christmas to everyone else here too.

Merry Christmas to you and your family Caroline :-D :-D

Not too many others on here, but it is still nice to see the regulars :-)

Merry Christmas, Humbug ;-) :-D

I hope 2025 brings you and yours health, happiness and prosperity...Happy New Year <3

Merry Christmas Nephew ;-)

Best wishes from Aunt Petunia <3

Merry Christmas Allan

Dear Allan

Hello

Hope you and your family have a contented and peaceful time.

Merry Christmas.

Take gentle care
Love EOS
xx

Great poem ????

Merry Christmas Allan

Merry Christmas to everybody

Panto Time then Allan :-D :-D
Hope you are having a great Christmas.
Ann x

Merry Christmas and Best Wishes Allan. :-)

Happy Christmas Allan :-)

Thank you all for your Christmas Greetings. I hope that you have had, and are continuing to have, the day of your choice.

Ours has been a very quiet one. :-D