General Chat

Hello everyone,

Have not been on for ages, hardly dared posting after all that time.
There has been so much going on, still is, which is very traumatisinig, it is still going on, and probably be worse before it gets better.Not really to do with my health, but my loved ones happiness, which is a million times worse for me.
My eldest, the badly handicapped one, is coming here in a few hours with her husband, this time from Ireland, where they moved to last year, because his mother is seriously ill in hospital, actually, in the last stages of cancer, as they say here. She was diagnosed with thryoid cancer (her mother died of this at a fairly young age) about 12 years ago. Since then, it has spread, in spite of the great care by specialiasts over the years.It is now in many organs. There is now talk about euthanasia-she wants it. Terrible descision to for her to make. The idea of knowing exactly the day & time you are going to leave this earth.....phew. For my s.i.l and his sister, it is almost as bad. So, not a happy visit at all. As for the other 'stuff' going on, that is dreaful too, but not so life-threatening.. Have to see about my eyesight, have to see if I have age-related macular degeneration, which is VERY scary....but,having said that, I wish I could make a deal with whoever is in charge-wherever, to let my loved ones be pain & illness free and be VERY happy...no way can this happen.

Must get moving, have a lot to do before my daugher & her husband arrive, want to make them at least comfortable whilst they are here....I cannot ease their pain... I have really admired my s.i.l's mum, she is what you would call eccentric, a great, courageous woman, we have had many laughs together and were able to exchange our concerns over the many years....haven't bothered her with any probs for years now, knowing how diffiucul her life has become with this terrible disease.Bless her. I only hope I get the chance to say goodbye to such a decent, funny, courageous before she dies. I am not sure, but think the descision for her to end her life will be sometime this coming week. Soooo sad.

Have tried to read some of the postings on this thread, but, to be honest, I can't seem to concentrate, so just wish you all a lot of happiness and peace of mind, which is the most anyone can wish to have.

God bess you all. Eileen

Thank you, Carole. Am still smarting a bit. I think that it is because mental health people are always full of promises that never come to anything and over the years am always let down. It feels a bit conflicting since if I don't go then others get more time (not that I have received any treatments yet in the three weeks I have attended). The shrink thought that it would be good for me to have some pampering instead of always looking after others.

So sorry to hear of this young man. You can always hear of others far worse than oneself. How terrible for him to have endured this and at such a young age. I have a young man staying with us who has suffered a breakdown but he is slowly getting himself back together, fortunately.

Thank you for your kind reply, I'll see how I feel when Friday comes! x :-)

Lavender don't worry about it, go again. I bet no one will say anything or remember.
I would have felt like you years ago cos thats the way my mum made me feel. I was so tense all the time incase I let someone down, was late, spilt something, dropped something, made a mistake ...........But I've learnt to be more relaxed and found everyone doesn't expect me to be perfect.

Next weekend I will have a house full. My daughter and her partner are coming to stay and my daughters friend. Daughter met this lad when she worked with him in Japan. He went home to Australia and later his parents allowed my daughter to house sti for three months with him and her then boyfriend in a lovely appartment in Perth. This friend was coming here a couple of years ago but found he had cancer. He has now finished his chemo and is having time in England. He's only 26 bless him. Plans to show him as much as posbible in a short weekend! Hope the weather stays like this.

Lavender don't worry about it, go again. I bet no one will say anything or remember.
I would have felt like you years ago cos thats the way my mum made me feel. I was so tense all the time incase I let someone down, was late, spilt something, dropped something, made a mistake ...........But I've learnt to be more relaxed and found everyone doesn't expect me to be perfect.

Next weekend I will have a house full. My daughter and her partner are coming to stay and my daughters friend. Daughter met this lad when she worked with him in Japan. He went home to Australia and later his parents allowed my daughter to house sti for three months with him and her then boyfriend in a lovely appartment in Perth. This friend was coming here a couple of years ago but found he had cancer. He has now finished his chemo and is having time in England. He's only 26 bless him. Plans to show him as much as posbible in a short weekend! Hope the weather stays like this.

((((((hugs)))))) Mary, you are bot having a good week (month?)

I suspect that you feel more sad than normal about your friend's daughter's death is because a). She was the same age as Coleen and b). You know it may have well been avoidable. And I hope that the light box soon works its magic. I too hate the winter but not to the extreme that I need a light box. I don't think it can help with you sleeping in the chair either because your body is not getting the proper sleep it needs, is there any way the bed can be fixed?

I hope you soon feel better and return to the positive Mary we know and love. Thinking of you <3 <3 <3 :-)

My goodness, two weeks since anyone has posted on our thread. I hope this doesn't mean that many are down in the dumps. . . . myself I have been computerless for almost 2 weeks, had to have the keyboard in my year-old laptop replaced, apparently a key had stuck or several keys, and I could no longer type!! I have been in withdrawal to the point that I have been visiting the public library to read email, but as use there is only for an hour at a time, I was well and truly backlogged by the time my laptop was ready today.

Managing a bit better with the hearing aids, they changed the in-ear gizmo, which was the wrong shape for me and the new one fits much better and am no longer constantly aware of the aid all day.

We are def heading into winter, frost on the ground in the mornings, I must get some new boots!! We have 2 tall maple trees on the property and they certainly have a monopoly on the most leaves to fall. The other thing which tells me that winter is approaching is that I am ready to shed tears at the drop of a hat, so I am back to using the SADD light. Almost feel like I've missed a few days of the citalopram, but haven't.
Absolutely disgusted with myself, I was contacted on facebook by a lady with whom I did my nursing training eons ago. She and her husband met at our wedding in 1965 and they have just celebrated a milestone anniversary. And there, for the world to see, was a photo of both of them that day. She looks gorgeous, and 20 years you nger than me. Beautiful skin and hair and clothes. I suspect that photo is what triggered my downslide this week. My daughter wanted to go out for supper with the kids, and I found myself feeling very self-conscious in the restaurant, with all my family looking cared-for and attractive, and me - looking positively shabby. None of my pants fit properly, packed on some weight when i was dealing with blood pressure issues and sat for hours at a time in the summer.. When one wears a couple of pairs all the time, because one can squeeze into them, they tend to wear out.
Then, a friend's daughter, same age as my Colleen, was killed this week in a stupid car accident, I am angry because she was thrown from the car, obviously not wearing her seatbelt, a responsible mother of 3 teenage girls, working for the government at the border crossing, why would she not take 10 seconds to wear the belt. . . . I know all the pat answers when someone dies, heavens I worked with death for over 22 years and strangely am comfortable with the process - at the end of life, or with incurable physical issues - but truly rattled over this.

Another friend, who is, along with me, co-moderator of our local Freecycle group, was admitted to hospital 3 weeks ago with a raging fever, finally diagnosed with West Nile virus and resulting viral meningitis. Two weeks on IV antibiotics and she was able to return home, severely weakened. She also runs the local wildlife rescue and rehabilitation service from her home. At the time she had skunks, baby raccoons, squirrels, ducks and some birds, all injured or otherwise unable to survive in the wild. Ordinarily, they are released back to their habitat once rehabbed.The service has now been closed until next April. I am very concerned that she has been put on limited activity for months, afraid that more is wrong than I know. I drove over to her home today to check on her, and the door was not answered. All I can do is worry. My specialty.
Sorry to run on, anxiety levels are trying to take over but I'll be darned if anxiety wins.
Have to get to bed now, or to my chair, because the bed collapsed from Gareth jumping on it, need some sleep, thanks for listening.
Night all, hope everyone else is chugging along.
mary

Glad you had a good time being a child again Carole. Disney is great fun isn't it?

Mary, you have reminded me I have to make green tomato chutney this week too. My children don't make it either, but they don't eat it either!!

Pleased to hear that Sarah is better, it takes a while to get the meds sorted doesn't it?

With my hearing aids I find it is best if I put my glasses on first and then the aids. If one is uncomfortable after a week I would go back and see if it is fitted correctly. What exactly is uncomfortable? The in the ear mould or the over the ear speaker? Maybe, like one of mine was, the tube is cut too short.

Welcome home Carole, glad you had a good time..
We are all pretty well here, though not enjoying the sudden onset of very chilly & windy weather. Emptied the veggie patch and made some green tomato chutney, today I am making "Yankee chutney" which is basically rhubarb and apples. Don't know why I bother, except that we all enjoy chutney. I know that once I stop this type of cooking, there will be no more for my family. Neither of my girls seem inclined to follow in my footsteps.
Our Sarah is doing much better finally, now that the second med for seizures has finally taken effect after multiple dose changes. She has lost 10 lb since the thyroid med began and looks less stressed, must have been feeling awful before, but unable to tell us, poor child.
These new hearing aids are taking some getting used to, one is very comfortable, the other is irritating, I suppose they will happily co-exist with my glasses eventually. In the meantime, I am realising how much I was missing in conversation and on television.
So glad Caz is feeling better, and Dutch, greatgrandma to twins WOW!
Happy Sunday everyone.
Mary

I'm home. Had a fantastic time in Florida with hubby, daughter and her boyfriend. Been to Disney, where kids were every where. They should be banned to give us grown up's chance to get on rides and meet the characters!! Haha I'm joking you all! Had two and a half days of constant heavy rain, but the rest of the time the temps were in the 80's. Have to start a new holiday fund for next time!

Caz I'm so pleased the meds are kicking in! Feels like you have no end in sight when waiting for them to work.
Joyce tells me she is the new gt gran to twins like you Hazel. How are you're little girls?

Mary sorry to hear about your brother. Hope he has recovered. How are you and the kids, and of course the dogs? Gale and Clair asked how you are by the way.

Hi to Ann, Lavender and Sharron ~~~~ xxx hope I haven't missed anyone :-S

I'm home. Had a fantastic time in Florida with hubby, daughter and her boyfriend. Been to Disney, where kids were every where. They should be banned to give us grown up's chance to get on rides and meet the characters!! Haha I'm joking you all! Had two and a half days of constant heavy rain, but the rest of the time the temps were in the 80's. Have to start a new holiday fund for next time!

Caz I'm so pleased the meds are kicking in! Feels like you have no end in sight when waiting for them to work.
Joyce tells me she is the new gt gran to twins like you Hazel. How are you're little girls?

Mary sorry to hear about your brother. Hope he has recovered. How are you and the kids, and of course the dogs? Gale and Clair asked how you are by the way.

Hi to Ann, Lavender and Sharron ~~~~ xxx hope I haven't missed anyone :-S

Hi girls, I am feeling a bit better thank goodness, I felt blooming awful for a while.
Ann the anti depressants are Flouoxetine and they have just started working this week so I imagine it's about 4/5 weeks to get into the system. Tell your friend to hold in there as she will start to feel better, although at the moment she won't believe it, I didn't.

How are the twins now Hazel, ( when you get back) mine are thirteen now but it doesn't seem two minutes since they were little. They are completely different temperaments, the one who you would think is ladylike loves nothing better than playing football with our local team at their own grounds. The other one is always dressing her hair up in different styles, I think she will turn out to be a hairdresser.

I've read all the above but my memory is terrible lately so forgive me if I don't mention things.

Love Caz xx

Caz, sorry that you feel the antidepressants are not working. Our friend who was widowed in April seems to have just started to suffer with depression. (She is also having a problem with her hip). She has said that the medication she has been given (I don't know which one it is) is not working but I don't think she has been taking it lomg. What sort of timescale should she be looking at for it to work?

Nice to see you back Caz.

Mary glad to see your brother is on the mend.

I hope to go and see the twins tomorrow be for i go away in few days time.Looks like the weather isnt going to be very good. Just hoping if its raining it will be at night, as we want to go grave hunting one of the days.

Bye for now

Hazelx :-D :-D

Hi girls, thanks for your concern, I've not been very well but starting to feel better now. It has left my depression worse though and I just want to sit in a corner and do nothing, I wake in a morning and wonder how to get through the day, I'm on anti depressants but they don't seem to be working, had them for a month now.
Mary I'm glad your brother is ok now, it is worrying at the time isn't it.
Hope everyone is ok and keeping well.

Love Caz xx

Today is our Thanksgiving day, have eten too much and feeling the effects. This past friday i wasn't sure if I would feel very grateful as I received a call that my brother had had a seizure and cardiac arrest.. He was revived and taken to hosp where he arrested twice more in the next 2 hours. Came home yesterday with a pacemaker having been inserted, almost as chipper as usual, with his warped sense of humour intact!! Exactly how my mother ended up with a pacemaker, seizure first then cardiac arrest. He is almost 20 years younger than she was when she first needed a pacemaker. I remember the day my brother was born, at home, and have no intention oif letting him leave before me!!
Hope Y Caz is feeling a bit better,
hugs
Mary

Hi all

Caz hope you are getting some sleep.

Yes i think they going to have fun when they get older. Sian is going to be the lively one i think, Savannah the quite one.

Take care all

Hazelx :-D :-D

Hope Caz is still feeling better.

Hope Caz is still feeling better.

Dear Y Caz, glad to hear you sounding a bit more chipper this evening, sending caring thoughts and warm energy your way,
love and hugs,
Mary <3

I think we guessed that Caz, glad you feel a bit better and hope for further improvement tomorrow.

((((((((((hugs))))))))) <3 <3 <3 <3 <3