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Christopher Andrew McCarthy

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Susan

Susan Report 12 Nov 2015 10:39

I am still searching for Christopher he will be 29 now and was adopted when he was 2 not sure what else to do . On lead says he may be in the London area but he could have a different name so back to square one any one any suggestions
Many thanks

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it

Shirley~I,m getting the hang of it Report 12 Nov 2015 10:47

Adopted at two it's possible the adoptive parents would keep his Christian name

Unless you know his new surname it's unlikely you can look for further info I,m afraid

Have you looked in members trees to see if he is listed

+++DetEcTive+++

+++DetEcTive+++ Report 12 Nov 2015 11:14

Someone else looking for him?
http://www.genesreunited.co.uk/boards/board/living_relatives/thread/1287948


Previous thread - 10 Mar 2014 21:47
http://www.genesreunited.co.uk/boards/board/living_relatives/thread/1338318?d=asc
I am looking for Christopher Andrew McCarthy born august 1986 in Oldham he was adopted when he was 2 so will have changed his name. He has been missed deeply and it was circumstance that caused the adoption which his dad has been tawn apart about and has and always will miss Christopher. Here's hoping that there is someone who may know of him

Did you follow through with the suggestion that you add your name to the Adoption Contact Register?
https://www.gov.uk/adoption-records/the-adoption-contact-register

JoonieCloonie

JoonieCloonie Report 12 Nov 2015 20:37

whoever posted the question at yahoo in 2006

https://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20060809114707AAFvn4Y

was advised at that time to come here and to add their name to the adoption contact register.

One hopes that sometime over the last 9 years, someone has managed to do that.

Repeatedly posting new messages at this site will only help if someone googles his name and finds a message here ... and only one message is needed for that purpose.

please just add to your existing thread (click 'My threads' on the right side to find it at any time) rather than starting duplicates where no one knows what advice you have been given in the past, and whether you have taken it ... since you don't give that info.

Susan

Susan Report 13 Nov 2015 00:22

Thanks for your posts I know one of them is his mum and the other was me my partner is his dad and his adoption has been eating him up for 27 years so I thought I would try and help . Thanks all x

JoonieCloonie

JoonieCloonie Report 13 Nov 2015 00:48

Susan it has been proposed that your partner add his name to the adoption contact register so that if Christopher does, they can be put in contact, and you've been asked in this thread whether he has done that

??

+++DetEcTive+++

+++DetEcTive+++ Report 13 Nov 2015 01:08

Look at it this way – if he is having a good and settled life with his legal family, he may not have any great desire to find his birth one. He may be so loved by his parents, that he may feel it would hurt them if he did.

A year or so ago there was a gentleman in his 30’s who used a thread as a sounding board. Eventually he decided to access his adoption file but only after his legal mother had died. We see that type of reaction quite frequently.

Including with the file were a number of letters written by his birth explaining how his birth parents had never forgotten him. He did eventually make contact with them and their extended family.

If Christopher’s birth parents/your partner haven’t already done so, then it’s something they should consider. Each time they move, they could write another letter giving the new address. If Christopher has half or even full siblings, if they agree, could do the same . Who knows? One day Christopher may take the plunge.

Although the details of his birth registration are not shown on freebmd, they are on Ancestry. It is possible to add comments to that site. If you were to take out a 14 day trial – remember to cancel before the period expires – you could leave a message with a generic email address eg @gmail, @hotmail etc just for that purpose. There’s no guarantee that he or a current relative will every see it, but it does give his birth family another avenue.

JoonieCloonie

JoonieCloonie Report 13 Nov 2015 02:54

agreeing with Detective on the idea of a note to the record at Ancestry ... just wanted to add to be careful not to make it intrusive of his privacy ... that could be upsetting or offputting if he saw it

something simple and generic like 'family lost touch and would like to meet' would mean something to him but not really to any stranger seeing the record

Susan

Susan Report 14 Nov 2015 07:38

Thanks I have a tree on ancestry so I will do that and yes he is registered many thanks for your thoughts .