Find Ancestors

Recently I have had many folks asking for BMD lookups(especially marriages) that they say they cannot find,but which are found on Freebmd with no problem.
Are they just too idle to look for themselves or do they not know how to use it or even are they unaware that it exists.
I like to help people but they should learn to do some things for themselves,and anyway it is much more satisfying to find things for yourself (after all they are your family)

Mary

I try to use FreeBMD when I can for some of my family who came from England as I don't have Ancestry or Find My Past but most of my family are Scottish or Irish.
The one English Birth I need is not on FreeBMD however.

Betty

A lot of members do not know how to find the possible brides or grooms when they find a marriage entry.

Although there are a few that are downright laxy

Maureen

betty
who you looking for and cant find?
mayhap we can help,or you already been down that route?
I think half are too idle/dont use it right and the other half dont know about freebmd
someone on here had to tell me about it.
vivienne

Yes Maureen that is obvious,so why don't they do what we all did when we started to use various sites read the instructions and try it out.It is not rocket science.
Just another example of todays "instant" culture,got to have it now and if someone else can do it so much the better.

Mary

They are just too lazy..I have noticed too that when you give them the link & then someone comes along and posts the find..you get totally ignored

I suspect part of the problem is the "helpers"!!

People ask for help when they cannot find something,there is a rush of info supplied by eager helpers but they do not always tell the recipient where to find the info for themselves.

Except for ericthered!

Yes the majority ARE lazy...Its easier to get someone else to do than to try themselves.

Also the problem is that many do not think out of the box.

The couple might have married many years after a birth of a child.

Surnames spelt slightly different or maybe the person always used a middle name etc etc

Some couples were married 26 years before the last child ,but having only the last childs birth might confuse new ones into looking for a marriage around the time of that birth.
Also looking for a marriage in an area different from where they are living.

If you dont have the census its confusing for new ones

I always use free BMD index its really good, i always said i wouldnt bother searching parish records for before 1837 but guess what? thats exactly what im doing now and its amazing what you can find online when you google! A lot of kind people on here have helped me when i have got stuck but it is more fun to do it yourself!

Yes I'm guilty of putting finds up without saying where they are from. In these times many want instant results and are far from interested in how we found them.
They just want to build their tree as quickly as possible before their attention span goes.

I dont see my role as an educator, nor do I expect please and thankyou,nobody makes me do this.
Just straight answers to straight questions and I'm sorry if that upsets some people,

I always try to put where I have found information, the whole web address, and also say whether it is free or not.


BUT I think another problem is that many think that if they have information that ancestor is called John Jack Jones .................... that is what they will find.

So they enter the whole name in the seach boxes


Plus they only use the year without any +/-

and they might well put in Hale Barns for birth place 'cos they know that was where he was born







and then call for help when they can't find him!




I do try to educate newbies about

...... the wild card *

....... less is better

....... using county rather than village name

....... using birth year +/- 5 (or even +/- 10 on occasions)


....... misspellings and mistranscribing


........ using given name only








but people don't think outside the box


and some of them get very upset about being given such advice.



sylvia

Not many weeks ago there was a great rush from lots of 'helpers' to provide answers, it was almost like a race amongst themselves which has now stopped. I can't see how this helps everyone. The
'helpers' often gave loads of information that wasn't wanted or asked for and got quite annoyed if they weren't thanked all the time.

Can I say to Saul I think that his comments are a bit scathing,
I am at Parish records now for my lot other than the brick walls I have, I have subs so am happy to do look ups.
I read Threads and decide where i can help so off I go looking.
Some records take a bit of searching for so often when I go back to the thread request I forget to refresh it so no apparent replies have been posted hence why later many of us searchers have posted the same info.
If along the way I find other info I post that as well if the enquirer hasn't stated what info they may already have. my reasoning is that all the more info may help.
Its nice to get feed back for time spent,I really dont want over the top thanks ,just a thanks for info would be good!!
I was brought up to thank people . my Mum used to say if you thank people you can always ask again

I think saul is totally unfair, still there is always one who is not satisfied. The helpers are doing a great job, they helped me start a new lead after hitting a wall. keep up the great work, and remember, it's in thier time, and they deserve a big thank you, so to all of you, thank you again.

Thank you Len .It is nice to see when time spent has been appreciated.

Hi, I always use Free bmd first, and although I am not dim and have been doing this for several years now, but sometimes I can't find a rellie on there either, so ask for help.

It always amazes me when they find them on the same site I couldn't. I'm not sure why that is, I often wonder if it's a turn around thing like the mormon site or if it's the amount of users at peak times or another possibility which I've recently discovered, it can be the way it's searched.

I would search using the info I knew for certain, sometimes I have only filled in the christian name and left surname out, and hey presto found what I was looking for.

So please don't assume it's because we're lazy, it can be a number of reason's why we can't find them, that's why we ask and why very kind and generous people on here offer their help.

Regards and thanks to those who have helped us all, your time and efforts are really appreciated.

Lou

I agree that most people are lazy but it doesnt help those people when you get looker-uppers who beg you to use them cos they are bored , i use bmd .org and found it useful on many occasions
Carol

You'll be amazed at how many times i have said there is a lovely free site you can use..then i type in the link

For what cos you only get ignored cos you ain't given them what they want