General Chat

Good Morning Everyone :-)

Thank You all for your kind words <3
I'm so sorry for the loss that each of you have expressed.

In particular, I would like to say how sorry I am to hear about your little baby, Lyndi.<3
I don't think there could possibly be anything like the grief of losing your child.

I do think that is insensitive Haribo. People can't just throw a switch and 'get over it'. My parents both died in 'old age' I miss them but don't have the degree of grief I probably would have had if they had died while I was young. The older we get the more people we lose, and sometimes friends cause us more grief than family. 17 years ago our son and daughter in law had a stillborn son, I know they still grieve for him but are fortunate to have two other lovely children which helps, I often wonder what he would be like now I suppose that is a kind of grieving.. Everyone is different I think.

Does anybody else find the term 'get over it' insensitive when talking about the loss of a parent, or any loved one? My parents died just over 20 years ago, yes, you learn to live with it but never 'get over it' and nor would I ever want to get over it..

I don't think there is. You just learn to live with the loss as time passes.

Is there a time limit on Grief

I hope so, I can't keep hoping my Mum is coming home for the rest of my life or I will go insane! :-(

My great uncle Edwin was killed in the war, leaving a pregnant wife, Gladys.

I have the original newspaper cutting of the announcement Gladys made.

To Gladys and the late Edwin, the birth of a stillborn girl.

Gladys died two years later, of TB.

That is so sad Joy. We never know what people have gone through or are going through.

That's so said
My Nana lost her Son at 4
It must of been hard for her
as her husband was also killed in the war
While she was pregnant

Thank you Joy. There are quite a few people on here who have suffered a similar loss, and probably many we don't know about. We have all got through in our own way, even when to start with we probably didn't know how we could go on living.

When doing my family tree I often wonder how the mums of the day got through, so many of them lost their babies and children. When I read the 1911 and see that they had 11 children and just 2 are still living - they must have had to be so strong. maybe that explains the stiff upper lip

So sorry Lindi
That must be the hardest loss of all :-( :-(

My heart goes out to you xx

There is no time limit. There are stages to grief but everybody goes through it in their own way in a time frame that is right for them. Most people make it through eventually to acceptance and learn to live with it, but sadly some get 'stuck' and that acceptance is a long time coming, sometimes never.

I find it hard to put into a few sentences how I have dealt with my grief, but most days I am fine. Just occasionally out of the blue I will have a flash back to that day and it is as if it has just happened. Sometimes I can work through it in minutes, sometimes hours - I haven't woken the next day still feeling it in a long time, but if this happens in a public place I find it difficult. My loss was 35 years ago.

Sorry about your dad Jemima, and your mum Joy. My dad died when I was 8 , but I think it must be worse to lose your mum at that age (just my opinion). The loss I wrote about was my son who died aged 4 months :-(

That was so sad Jem for you at a you g age and a nightmare situation too to lose your home as well. <3 <3

Thank You Joy :-)

So sorry about your Dad JemimaFawr
I agree with what your saying :-(

Do you ever really get over the death of a loved one, especially your mother?
Particularly at such a young age!

I don't think so.
I think like Ann has said, it's a case of learning to live with it, and coming to terms with it. But the boys would have made their mother so proud! <3
And it's great that they are speaking out about it now, which will help others who are suffering.

So sorry to hear about the loss of your Mum when you were a child, Joy <3

I lost my Dad in a fire that also destroyed our home in 1976, when I was 18.
I still have my moments over that.

He had brought my brother and myself up as a single parent since he and my mother divorced when I was 5. That was a different kind of loss of a mother, but nevertheless a loss, and again, something I had to learn to live with.

Its all in the past for me Ann
But thank you x :-D
It sort of made me a stronger person :-D :-D

It must possibly be one of the hardest things to come to terms with, losing your Mum when young, I am sorry to hear that Joy. <3

I so feel sorry for them
As my Mum also died when I was a child :-( :-(

No. :-(

The answer to that Joy is no I think. People grieve in different ways but I think rather than getting over it they learn to live with it. I have a feeling that William and Harry will have been persuaded by their father to keep a stiff upper lip. i.e. To bottle up their emotions and not express their grief so they have had to work through it all this time later. That is so sad isn't it?