General Chat

Joy, Here's one my mum was always fond of using: 'I'm as sick as a yuckle!!' to which you'd reply 'What's a yuckle??' and her answer: I don't know, but it must be bloody sick!!' *********************** Here are some quotations about families... They say that blood is thicker than water. Maybe that's why we battle our own with more energy and gusto than we would ever expend on strangers. David Assael If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance. George Bernard Shaw Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. George Burns Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. Jane Howard Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Leo Tolstoy A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. Ogden Nash Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about. Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Ike's Wee Wee, 1998 I think people that have a brother or sister don't realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there's always somebody there, somebody that's family. Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Cat Orgy, 1999

When I say 'I Wish' my Mum retorts 'Wish in one hand, Sh*t in the other and see which one gets full first' Isn't she lovely?!!!!!!!! Joy

'And if the wine you drink, the lip you press That all begins and ends in.....yes Think then, you are today what yesterday you were Tomorrow you shall not be less' - Rubayyat

A man is as old as the woman he feels. Lunacy runs in families; you get it from your kids.

As promised Dave, a few from a genius.. 'You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.' 'My wife phoned me just before the show, and she said, 'I've got water in the carburettor.' I said, 'where's the car?' she said, 'in the river.' 'I went to the dentists, he said 'my teeth are all right but my gums have gotta come out.' I went to see the doctor today and I said ' I keep dreaming these beautiful girls keep coming towards me and I keep pushing them away.' So he said 'what do you want me to do?' and I said 'break me arms.' 'Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad... or my older brother Colin... or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I think it's Colin.' 'I saw this girl across the room. I cocked one eye at her, she cocked one eye at me. There we stood, cock-eyed.' Tommy Cooper

bis dat qui cito dat He gives twice who gives quickly or opportunely. Or He who pays promptly, pays double. David

Nice one Dave, I'll post a few more from Tommy Cooper shortly,more one liners than quotations..but it's my thread and I'll do what i like with it!! lol watch this space

' I've started so I'll finish! ' My (then) young daughter when told to stop drinking her gravy from the plate. Some of these have ben quite amising, especially the Tommy Cooper one. Dave

'Never In the Field of Human Conflict was so Much Owed by So Many to So Few' Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen Winston Churchill.

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. Steve Martin Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony-Mahatma Gandhi

... me, Paul (from Hampshire)?! :-) ''The word bouncebackability was first coined by ex-footballer Iain Dowie, now manager of Crystal Palace football club, who famously described his team as showing ‘… great bouncebackability’. The word is of course formed from suffixation of the phrasal verb bounce back with -ability ...'. :-) Joy (Kentish Maid, with bouncebackability)

everyone brings joy to this office... some when they enter, others when they leave! ??

I know that feeling well CB, very motivational isn't it? lol How about this one?.... It's not true that life is one damn thing after another; it is one damn thing over and over. Edna St. Vincent Millay ....sums it up! We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance. Harrison Ford (see my other thread entitled-I HAVE A SON!!!)

If you're not the lead dog, the view never changes.

Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it's only for wallowing in. Katherine Mansfield

I reject your reality -- and substitiute my own. Adam Savage Mythbusters

you inherit yer family thank god you can chose yer friends! and Life is like a bowl of toenails

After reading Dave's school thread here are a few pearls of wisdom on the subject of education Education... has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading. G. M. Trevelyan (1876 - 1962), English Social History (1942) Everyone has a right to a university degree in America, even if it's in Hamburger Technology. Clive James I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. Mark Twain Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance. Will Durant

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. Rich Cook

There are holes in the sky where the rain comes in, but the holes are small, thats why rain is thin. Spike Milligan If you have noticed this notice, you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing! ? Nick