General Chat

What would you do differently if you had your time again, what changes would you make to the life you have lived so far.

I would have learnt languages and improved my job choices although I loved my working life. I would still have married young as I loved being a young mum and enjoyed this time with my children. School summer holidays meant cheap biscuits and orange squash as our house was always full of other peoples children although we never had much money. I would have made a better choice when it came to marrying husband number one, I have some things to thank him for but also a lot more that I would rather not have had.

I would have met husband number two many years earlier than I did.

What would you change, realistic things, not wanting to win the lottery etc.

Wish I had never met husband number 2.

At times I felt like that about husband number 1 but he is the father of my two lovely girls and divorcing him and selling our home got me on the housing ladder. We are friends now. Hope all is well for you now GlitterBaby

I would have never had married OH number 1.
Not listened to him putting me down and carried on with my college course.
Met OH number 2 long before I eventually did as he is a sweet considerate partner and friend.

Probably the only thing I'd do differently, is to have adopted one of my foster sons, and not of let my foster daughter of gone to the awful family she went to.

Apart form that nothing, I've had a truly blessed life, apart from the loss of dear family and friends who I have lost, but that's something we can't do anything about, unfortunately :-(

I'd have told my mother in law what an evil old cow she was - same for father in law - I was too mild mannered at the time

I would still have married my lovely OH - just wish I could have kept him for longer

LaGooner, my second husband was the love of my life but I thought I was in love first time round. How wrong was I?

Lynda, it's lovely to hear that someone's life has gone almost as planned. Sadly, as you say there are some things over which we have no control.

Ann I'm sorry but I laughed at your opening statement. Lol. At least you're honest. Obviously your lovely husband didn't take after his parents x

I wouldn't change my life as such. I married young and had 2 children by the age of 21. I enjoyed being a yong mom and although money was tight at times we did loads with the children eg. going to parks and taking picnics ( squash and jam or marmite sarnies)
One thing I would change would be I would become more assertive and not let my mother emotional blackmail me to do what she wanted

I pledged never to do that to mine and I didn't and we have a wonderful relationship.

I have learnt by my mistakes too Ginnie but at times it took me a long time to realise. I stayed too long in marriage number 1 as I couldn't bare the thought of some people who had said that I shouldn't marry him saying I told you so.

I think if you are loved, especially as a child, and you can give love, that's you sorted for life, well it's worked for me :-D

They are lovely words Lynda but I think I was loved as a child and I think I have a loving and giving nature.

I sort of got married the first time due to circumstance. My ex OH was one of 13 children 8 survived and they all lived at home in a three bedroom house. My dad died when I was four, my grand parents moved in then my sister got married and her husband moved in. Neither of us had ever had a bedroom or any kind of space to call our own. My mother and family decided to move away, a friend said they knew of a flat to rent. In 1962 nobody just lived together so we got married. Probably if my family hadn't moved away my relationship with husband number one would have fizzled out instead of ending in marriage.

All very irresponsible when I look back on it. I was 18 he was 17!!! All that changed for him was he lived with me and not his mother, he continued to live the single live as all seventeen year olds should do, without the marrying bit. He always worked hard and provided for us but was never at home.

oh do not start me off Tener........Where would I start?

Susan wiv......at the beginning

Just to add to my post, "I think if you are loved, especially as a child, and you can give love, that's you sorted for life"

It sounds like I meant if you're lucky enough to experience that, nothing bad happens, what I meant was if whoopsies hits the fan, you can cope better :-D

Edit ...Susan wiv, the beginning is a very good place to start :-D

That, I agree with Lynda you seem to be able to cope with all that gets thrown at you.


Anybody got any changes they would make that don't include changing their partner!

I would have kept my parents married, at least until we were all adult.

In the 1950's divorce was NEVER mentioned and my sister and I were forbidden from telling anyone, or talking about it.

At a school reunion I was asked about my "odd" family set-up and told my friends the truth!! Just 40 years too late.

No, as I feel sure anything done differently,as possibly through making mistakes or was they? then I wouldnt be where I am today.

I'm very satisfied with my life.

all in all I'm pretty satisfied too - think I could have been a better mother - was too wound up and tense - lost three babies and when I eventually manged to get one I was over protective and a bag of nerves - not a good frame of mind

Andy Mum.. There were so many things that were just not mentioned in the '50's and as I said earlier it was unheard of to just live with someone that you weren't married to.

Kay.. I sometimes think. "What if" maybe it's a good job we can't turn the clock back.

Ann.. I'm sorry you had such a struggle to get your baby and it's understandable you were extra protective. Clearly you never got any support from your in laws either. I hope you had other family around you.