General Chat

Hi Hope someone know about lawyers and children As some off you know from the pat on here my daughter and her children dad are not together. A month ago he moved back down to here from Scotland. He said he wont to see the boys but children 1 who Is 8 does not wont to see him children 2 who Is 5 said if he not going them I not, So he payed someone £660 00 to sit in a room with him and her and at the end of it this person said this will not get sorted here that they need to go to court that it in a nut shell. Yesterday grandchild 1 when to see his friend as he call this women at children services he has needs in school and out off school she told my daughter that he should not see the boys That a lot of the children problems are to do with him. Mu daughter has no money for a lawyer and she will not get help with one, we know this because in may she need a lawyer to help with benefit office and she earn to much. One of my friend has said as mad as this sound can the boys not get help in paying a lawyer to go to court for them. Dose anyone know anything about lawyer and children and paying them thank you

The dad is the one who needs to seek access through a court.........so till that request is put in writing to your daughter from his soliciitor then she doesnt need to do anything at this stage.

She will at some point need to state her case via a family lawyer.......If there are circumstances why it would not be in the childrens best best interest for contact this can be put forward when a hearing date is set,,,,,,,this isnt in a public court room but takes place in private.

Supervised visits can be put in place. open access,or limited access.

Even with an access order in place a children can not be made to have contact if it doesnt want to of its own accord, and must not be pressured by the parent they live with.

It can take months to sort out.

All the costs may be awared to the father,if social services are already involved with the family then your daughter can seek their advise regarding a representive.

He was given the chance to have supervised visit but turn that down . When they were together and he had boys when she was at work child1 how shall I put it he keep doing thing like falling down the stairs but it only happen when he had them. when they lived with us for a few month he get up one night to see to child1 who was crying in the morning children 1 had to be taken to A&E with a lump on his head did not have when he when to bed. When doctor at A&E asked him about it he got rude told him to mind it That is part of why children service do not wont him seeing them

Your daughter needs to laise with children services.each case is decided on many factors.If shes not happy with any CServices worker then rights for complaints can be took up.

Supervised contact maybe all he will get offered under court access rights,

Everything should be done for the best interests of the child/children.

Update
My daughter got his lawyer letter yesterday full of lies. The letter says that he is living in a 3 bedroom flat as this time he is not, we do not know were he is living .

Child service have been into school this week and had a very good outcome with the school and the new head. He also has asked for a DNA test on grandchild 1 but he does not wont to pay for it ,she told him her goes on the boys so he told her to get us to pay for it.

He phone to say he will go to the boys school and take them out of school. The school and the head have said no way are they going to let that happen , as he has never been to the school. One last attempt was made my her this week he was asked if he wont to go to the school Christmas play he did not turn up . Also he wont her to pay half of his layer fees.

Also forgot to say child service are still saying no way goes he get to see the boys and they also said that they will go to family court with her because we need to do what is right for the boys Grandchild 1 had a meeting with his friend as he call the women from c service just the 2 of them in the room and has told her he goes not wont to see him, he does not like his dad.

So we will jut have to take this one step at a time

Poor kids, how worrying this must be for you and your daughter, and children must feel under pressure too. Hope things work out ok.


Lizx

It's good she has the Social Services involved. She needs to send them a copy of any correspondence she gets from him or his solicitor

If he wants a DNA test then let him pay for it he must have money if he has paid for a solicitor He may be doing a bluff though and paid for a one off letter to be sent from a solicitor to put the frighteners on

Sadly these days legal aid has been stopped for these types of case so solicitors and court lawyer fees do rocket

It cost nearly £12000 when daughter and son in law went to court over custody of his son from a previous relationship and this was with the social services behind them

I know how stressful it all was for our daughter and SIL

I hope it works out well for the children and your daughter. It is good that S Services and the school are aware.

Update on what is going on with the grandchildren

Over Christmas he made our live hell. She took the boy to see him on Christmas eve but all he did Christmas day was ring my house phone and text her. He has gone to court to get a court order to see the boys. Children service are saying on way is he to have them my his self. He has text her saying he will make her life hell and ours. We go to court at the end of March. Daughter took grandson 1 to doctor yesterday and the doctor has put on the sick for 2 weeks because of this. He will not go to any hospital appointment that the boys have got. When grandson 2 was ill he would not help to look after him but he moan that I was looking after him so she could take grandson 1 to his appointment with children service. I wont to go away with her grandsons and my other daughter at Easter but we know he will make trouble if we do. We will just have to see what happen but I wont to know how someone can move away from his children for over a year and then think he can came back and make demands

he sounds like a control freak and still trying to control :-( :-(
I would ignore as much of his behaviour as possible
and keep a diary of events

it looks liker your daughter is doing everything right :-D :-D

the children come first and not him
and maybe he should be reminded of this :-D

Well Daughter when to family court 2 week go He Got 3 hour a week to see the boys He did not wont them on a weekend He wont them on a Monday because of his job. He would not have them last Monday because of his job. On sunday he rung her and said was not having this Monday because of a work thing. He also rung CSA and told them a liar that he had sorted his money for the boys out with her They stop his payment to her from him ,this happen 4 week ago till trying to sort it The CSA have said they are sorry and they should have spoken to her before they stopped his money. Yesterday CSA phone her to say He will not return there phone call and do we know where he is.She had to go to boys school yesterday and tell them that the court told him to get in touch with them and he has to go school event for the boys I bet he does. We go back to court in July so the court can see how well he has done What a waste of time for the court and for her

What a waste of soace he is. And how upsetting for his children.

Sounds a waste of space just like my ex son in law. :-| :-| :-|.

I don't think he really wants the children.

He's only doing this to upset everybody, and to upset your daughter more than he has already.

I hope, for everyone's well-being, that he gets fed up and goes back to Scotland (they probably don't want him there either!).

<3 for your daughter, I hope she stays strong.

Legal aid is no longer available for family matters unless there have been incidents of serious violence.

Social services are not in a position to act as default lawyers except where they have taken a child into care. The social services have no rights of representation in court - they are not lawyers - though their evidence is of course important. They cannot appoint and pay a lawyer on yr behalf - see para 1.

The inevitable result of the withdrawal of legal aid for family matters ( and it goes on to all aspects of divorce, wills, mortgages/rent etc etc ) is that many people have ended up having to represent themselves despite having little capability to do so.

That this is hardly justice has been complained about by some of the highest judges in the land.

Should any party to a dispute fail to honour a court order then that is contempt of court. The penalties imposed are often drastic including imprisonment.

People playing with hearts and lives of those close to them.......children never forget,
it always comes out in the end on how they feel........

Parents, Father/Mothers have a choice the children do not.......

ha sounds like a right master baker to me
he is playing games trying to keep control of your daughter
and because he cant making her life difficult


its time to tell him the days of him been in control are long over :-( :-(

When i divorced my husband he walked out and never made contact for 3 weeks , then he turned up wanting to see our 5 year old son.I told him that he could not and in future he would have to make an appointmemt to see him.
He turned nasty and tried to get full custody , when we went to court before we went in the room we were interviewed by a mediator and again he turned nasty and demanding, but i made my case kept my cool and the mediator was very good.. we walked out of that room with my husband signing away his rights to see the child unless it was by prior arrangement and agreement with myself.
Surely something like this is available ?
He never made any maintenance payments and so we had nothing to thank him for, although i did not stop him seeing our son as i thought that was the best road to go down to stop any bitterness later on, and it has worked. :-)

It was a nightmare at the time I must admit,but i think i did what was right for our child, he now has 3 children of his own and their grandfather and i have buried the hatchet that could have destroyed a happy future for all the children involved.

Well done Stella
a pat on the back where it is well deserved :-D :-D

He has told her this can all go away if she takes him back. The court is sending someone to talk to Grandchild 1 as he will be 9 in a few weeks time about what he wont He was was asked in court what he knows about the boys needs eg grandchild 2 meds and he knows nothing and has never tried to found out about the children need. CSA have still not got a reply from him