General Chat

Liz hit him over the head with one of her stillettos and quickly hobbled back to the pub yelling for her

cosmetic surgeon to fit her in asap. They are just too heavy for me Vernon she cried

"but babes I love them - they are you - they are my cushions, my pillows"

I'll buy you a beanbag Vern! either that or a beachball. Vernon gave Liz his best droopy eyed look and said

well if you must, you must. She said "Yes, I must" and that was that. Vernon wondered how he was going to fill his time now and thought - drums!!! He went down to the cellar to see

if his stash of mens mags were where he had left them!! No, there gone he groaned as his fishy eyes swiveled around the celler

but instead hidden behind a barrel of Guiness draught (bought for the Irish invasion for the wedding? of the year) was a pile of magazines - eagerly he grabbed them - only to throw them aside in disgust - they were Sean's gay magazines - Vernon was so upset (whether at the loss of his magazines or the finding of Sean's - we will never know) but

he was surprised Sean could even read - perhaps he had just been looking at the pictures - perhaps he would tell Violet what a little pervert Sean was! He thought better of it though and decided the best course of action was to

put them round at Audreys salon and the surgery waiting room.
Gail was abosolutly horrified,her wee beedie eyes about popped out at she flicked through the pages.
This gave her an idea, she would....

take them over to Eileens, as one of the models
was no other than

Spider!!!!!!!!! What would happen when Eileen saw him posing as a

chipolata,advertisings Ashleys butchers.Eileen just had to have

a fit of the vapours whilst

Gail was on guard dog duty at the surgery! You can have an appointment in 6 months said Gail with a smug look on he face. I might be dead by then said Eilleen as she

flung the door open into the PRIVATE - STAFF ONLY area to find 4 doctors and 2 nurses playing Monopoly and promptly collapsed on the floor - having never seen so many medical staff at one time - however

no one rushed to help her, so she dragged
herself off the floor and over to the rovers where
sean was

behind the bar and mincing about in a white jumper but he took one look at her face, told her to sit down and he would bring her over a sweet sherry - on the house. Liz heard these last words and roared

over my dead body,once she gets the taste of that we wont have any left.When shes drunk she thinks all the boys want her and starts

who - Eileen?????????????????

oh, I could tell you a thing or two
about her, Gail said, you have no room to